the vice-regal tart in waiting

The Daily Telegraph, if it ain't promoting the Princess of
LongPins, it's promoting her sister. On Wednesday, they
posted her on the cover, talking about her crush on her
sports coach.
It was posted with the fetching foto:

If it ain't her buttocks in the paper, or her boobs, it's
the things that get her motor revving, and that's just
a euphemism for her fanny.

It's all the new royal family, keeping the prols frothing
with some tits and ass.
If you have the patience to read the story below, she
actually talks about her tits and ass. I'm no expert on
netball, but I don't think the tits and ass are vital
parts of a winning strategy. You're playing against
girls, first of all.

Back in my hometown, if you stood in front of everybody
and talked about what turns you on, it's like you're telling a
whole bunch of guys you want them stuffed into your
underpants.
We called that a hosebeast.

So, before you Conservative boys knock one out of the
park, here's a message from Louis CK:

the problem with too much jacking off at 6:50 and onwards



checkit: theweek.co.uk

Pippa Middleton reveals crush on 'undeniably fanciable' master


PIPPA MIDDLETON has put her old hockey master at Marlborough College on the spot by disclosing that she found him "undeniably fanciable" - just as he is starting work as headmaster of another private school.

The sister of the Duchess of Cambridge mentioned her crush on Richard Markham in an article for an independent schools supplement put out by The Spectator.

Markham, who taught Pippa and Kate Middleton history as well as taking hockey, is now 41 and begins work this week as headmaster of £14,379-per-year Hockerill Anglo-European College in Bishop's Stortford.

As the Daily Telegraph reports, "his attempts to impose himself on the pupils are unlikely to be helped by the recollections of his former charge".

Pippa, whose forays into journalism include articles for Vanity Fair and Waitrose Kitchen magazine, wrote her Spectator piece under the headline: 'Confessions of a sporty schoolgirl'.

She describes running in a cross-country race wearing "tiny athletic shorts" and "caked in mud from head to toe". On the netball court, she admits to having used her "derriere for defence" because "my 'chest' hadn't developed back then"....

Naff off, tiny dancer

[the Plastic Princess, in wax]


I like how girls are encouraged to dream by having little

ballerina or princess toys. They dream of the big
wedding, and get Joe Pubcrawl.
So, then they project  that desire onto the cute
princess.
Until a mansome lady comes along and shits
on the parade of Her Mosquito-bite Titties.

Hillary Mantel rescued defeat out of the hands
of victory by saying how wonderful Diana was.
She was seriously interesting, but still a royal
diversion, in a fur , with no knickers. *pant*

Anyway. The Great Fawning was shut down for a day.

Hurrah

the baby bump felt the stress 

checkit: Sky News

Hilary Mantel: Kate Is A 'Plastic Princess'

 Hilary Mantel criticised the Duchess of Cambridge during a lecture

Award winning author Hilary Mantel has launched a scathing attack on the Duchess of Cambridge, describing …

Award winning author Hilary Mantel has launched a scathing attack on the Duchess of Cambridge, describing her as "designed by committee", in a lecture at the British Museum.

The 60-year-old author, who won the Man Booker Prize in 2009 and 2012, compared Kate to Anne Boleyn, Marie Antoinette and Princess Diana during the lecture entitled Undressing Anne Boleyn.

In it, she said: "It's rather that I saw Kate becoming a jointed doll on which certain rags are hung.

"In those days she was a shop-window mannequin, with no personality of her own, entirely defined by what she wore.

"These days she is a mother-to-be, and draped in another set of threadbare attributions ... her only point and purpose being to give birth."

She also described the Duchess as having a "perfect plastic smile" and said her first official portrait, unveiled last month, revealed "her eyes are dead and she wears the strained smile of a woman who really wants to tell the painter to b***** off".

The lecture for the London Review of Books was given on February 4, but the full version of her speech will be published in the latest edition of the review on Thursday.

Mantel, author of Thomas Cromwell novels Wolf Hall and Bring Up The Bodies, said Kate was not like Anne Boleyn who was a "power player, a clever and determined woman".

It comes as the Duchess will show off her baby bump for the first time when she visits a project for women recovering from substance dependence.

 The 31-year-old will visit Hope House, a project run by Action On Addiction of which she is a patron; it will be her first solo engagement of 2013.

 Charity CEO Nick Barton later came to the Duchess's defence, describing her as an "intelligent" woman who was genuinely interested in the work of his organisation.

 Asked for his reaction to Mantel's criticisms, Mr Barton said: "I don't think it's for me to comment on that kind of stuff. I speak of what I know – somebody who wants to help, is helpful and genuinely interested and is intelligent.

 "I can only speak (of) what I know. I've met her several times and I found her to be engaging, I found her very natural, I found her actually genuinely interested in the subject.

 "You can tell a lot from people's questions and she asks really good questions. They're not routine stuff, they're questions of someone who wants to learn. I find her very easy to deal with."