This is the "incontrovertible proof" of who Jack the Ripper was.
[Clue-the Hairdresser, in the alley, with a knife]
This was grimy 19th c East London, where alleys seemed to be
the only mode of transit.
Some DNA was found on a victim's belongings that has linked
her to a particular Polish immigrant hairdresser.
UPDATE: If you want to see a bio movie about another Polish
killer, check the Iceman (2012). The main character, Kuklinski,
called Pollack, looks very much like the picture above.
But, I digress:
Kosminski was a bit unstable, and he was a suspect, but was never
collared for the crimes. I haven't really had time to study this
but on first listen, the evidence does seem, despite DNA,
to be a bit coincidental. I mean, they found semen on the
shawl of one victim, a hooker.
All that proves is that Kosminski had purchased a hand-job
within the previous 24 hours, or given a particularly
close hairstyle. If there was DNA proof on two
victims, then I would tend to think he's, or was guilty.
Proof [at 55:35]:
Anyway, you decide.
I kinda wanted the royal looney to take the fall.
Forgot his name.
And to think that other people were lynched by mobs
for these attacks.
On a personal note, I worked near that site, teaching,
and I've taught a student named Kosminski. Creepy!
checkit: CBC
Jack the Ripper case solved, according to new book and new DNA evidence
Wednesday, September 10, 2014 | Categories: Features 0
Aaron Kosminski was 23 at the time of the Whitechapel murders. Though a suspect, he was never charged. He spent most of his life in a mental institution, where he died.
The case of Jack the Ripper has been solved, according to a new book called "Naming Jack the Ripper". In that book, author Russell Edwards claims the Ripper's identity was Aaron Kosminski - a schizophrenic, immigrant hairdresser in his 20s who was a suspect at the time. Edwards' theory comes on the heels of many others. This time it's based on forensic DNA.
"We based this analysis on the shawl from the crime scene of one of the victims"
Forensic specialist Jari Louhelainen was able to extract DNA from a bloody shawl belonging to Ripper victim Catherine Eddowes that he says proves that Aaron Kosminski was the Ripper.
"We were able to compare mitochondrial DNA from semen stains shawl to the descendant of Aaron Kosminski, and make the match"
Two stains were identified on the shawl: one blood and one semen. Using mitochondrial DNA, and a maternal descendant of the victim, researchers identified the blood as that of the victim. And then working with a genealogist, author Edwards located a maternal descendant of the suspect, Kosminski, and Louhelainen made the match to the semen.
While he is confident in his results, Louhelainen does acknowledge that there is still room for doubt.
"Because this is mitochondrial DNA can't be as sure as we would be with the modern DNA"
Saturday, 11 April 2015
A most English of bank jobs
In my time in the UK, I have seen just how much
policing in the UK is represented by some key concepts:
All the head-shaking story
checkit: the Guardian
Hatton Garden jewellery raid: CCTV footage emerges
Video shows at least six men arriving at Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company’s building in London’s jewellery quarter
Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company building
It is thought that millions of pounds’ worth of jewels, gold and cash were stolen in the raid on the Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company.
Dominic Smith and agencies
Saturday 11 April 2015 10.39 BST Last modified on Saturday 11 April 2015 11.38 BST
CCTV footage has emerged reportedly showing a gang of robbers executing the Hatton Garden jewellery heist over the Easter weekend.
A video obtained by the Mirror shows at least six men arriving at the Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company’s building in the London jewellery quarter on Thursday evening.
The paper said the men made two separate visits before leaving on Easter Sunday with the contents of 72 safety deposit boxes in wheelie bins and bags, and making a getaway in a white van.
The footage comes a day after it emerged that police were alerted to an intruder alarm just after midnight on Good Friday but did not respond. Scotland Yard said it was “too early to say if the handling of the call would have had an impact on the outcome of the incident”. The Metropolitan police declined to comment on the CCTV footage.
It is thought that millions of pounds’ worth of jewels, gold and cash were stolen in the raid. Many of the owners of the high-value deposit boxes had no insurance on items worth several thousands of pounds.
The CCTV footage appears to confirm reports that the men had several days to carry out the raid, with the heist taking place over the Easter weekend. A source was quoted as saying: “This was clearly the work of a professional gang who planned this job down to every last detail. But they may have made a mistake in leaving this footage behind.”
Cops and ex-robbers on Hatton Garden heist: 'This is no bunch of mugs'
Read more
In a 17-minute video published on the Mirror’s website, the camera centres on a doorway, with an adjacent intercom, at the bottom of a stairway to the street.
Several men appear wearing hi-vis jackets and masks, and are seen carrying tool boxes and holdalls. Some manoeuvre wheelie bins in and out of the building, before a white van is driven away shortly before 7am on Easter Sunday which the paper says contained the bins and bags.
Advertisement
It was not until Tuesday morning – more than four days later – that the raid was discovered.
Ex-robbers told the Guardian on Friday that the expensive goods could already have been taken out of the country. One said:“This is no bunch of mugs. They’re never going to be nicking this stuff without it having a place to go to already arranged.”
Depositors reacted with fury to the news that police did not respond to the initial alarm. One identified only as Simon, 46, said his brother had an uninsured box worth £150,000 containing diamonds, platinum and gold.
“I’m very angry. It’s my brother’s life down there and the worst thing is we don’t know what’s happened,” he said.
“You would imagine the police would come straight away, wouldn’t you, on a street like this? It’s absolutely ridiculous. That place should have been wired to the police straight away. It’s all going to come out isn’t it. But that doesn’t help us. We’re in limbo and struggling.”
policing in the UK is represented by some key concepts:
box ticking
corruption
sleeping on the job
"oh, ignore that, it's broken"
we're lucky to have 70 million sheep to protect
"you got no proof for that"
"you got no proof for that"
This story has all of those concepts.
So, this big Easter egg of a robbery is the most English of jobs.
To sum up, every cop went to sleep over the long
Easter holiday weekend, thinking that every one of their
sheep was sitting on a patio getting sauced on fizzy beer.
The thieves started on Thursday night. They didn't hit an alarm
until Friday night. They split the scene fearing.....the cops,
who seem to have decided that the alarm was too sensitive.
The cops didn't even drive past. A security company did, but
didn't do a full report on the full site.
The thieves came back over Saturday and Sunday and
cleaned out 70-something safe-deposit boxes. In the
jewellery district that means a mass of untraceable
rocks.
Where's Michael Cane when you need him?
All the head-shaking story
checkit: the Guardian
Hatton Garden jewellery raid: CCTV footage emerges
Video shows at least six men arriving at Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company’s building in London’s jewellery quarter
Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company building
It is thought that millions of pounds’ worth of jewels, gold and cash were stolen in the raid on the Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company.
Dominic Smith and agencies
Saturday 11 April 2015 10.39 BST Last modified on Saturday 11 April 2015 11.38 BST
CCTV footage has emerged reportedly showing a gang of robbers executing the Hatton Garden jewellery heist over the Easter weekend.
A video obtained by the Mirror shows at least six men arriving at the Hatton Garden Safe Deposit company’s building in the London jewellery quarter on Thursday evening.
The paper said the men made two separate visits before leaving on Easter Sunday with the contents of 72 safety deposit boxes in wheelie bins and bags, and making a getaway in a white van.
The footage comes a day after it emerged that police were alerted to an intruder alarm just after midnight on Good Friday but did not respond. Scotland Yard said it was “too early to say if the handling of the call would have had an impact on the outcome of the incident”. The Metropolitan police declined to comment on the CCTV footage.
It is thought that millions of pounds’ worth of jewels, gold and cash were stolen in the raid. Many of the owners of the high-value deposit boxes had no insurance on items worth several thousands of pounds.
The CCTV footage appears to confirm reports that the men had several days to carry out the raid, with the heist taking place over the Easter weekend. A source was quoted as saying: “This was clearly the work of a professional gang who planned this job down to every last detail. But they may have made a mistake in leaving this footage behind.”
Cops and ex-robbers on Hatton Garden heist: 'This is no bunch of mugs'
Read more
In a 17-minute video published on the Mirror’s website, the camera centres on a doorway, with an adjacent intercom, at the bottom of a stairway to the street.
Several men appear wearing hi-vis jackets and masks, and are seen carrying tool boxes and holdalls. Some manoeuvre wheelie bins in and out of the building, before a white van is driven away shortly before 7am on Easter Sunday which the paper says contained the bins and bags.
Advertisement
It was not until Tuesday morning – more than four days later – that the raid was discovered.
Ex-robbers told the Guardian on Friday that the expensive goods could already have been taken out of the country. One said:“This is no bunch of mugs. They’re never going to be nicking this stuff without it having a place to go to already arranged.”
Depositors reacted with fury to the news that police did not respond to the initial alarm. One identified only as Simon, 46, said his brother had an uninsured box worth £150,000 containing diamonds, platinum and gold.
“I’m very angry. It’s my brother’s life down there and the worst thing is we don’t know what’s happened,” he said.
“You would imagine the police would come straight away, wouldn’t you, on a street like this? It’s absolutely ridiculous. That place should have been wired to the police straight away. It’s all going to come out isn’t it. But that doesn’t help us. We’re in limbo and struggling.”
Sunday, 22 March 2015
Phillip K Dick foresees facial recognition
This is a mask designed to fool facial recog
software:
It looks surprisingly similar to a full-body
cloak in a movie I've seen which was
based on a Phillip K Dick book.
In the movie of A Scanner Darkly,
the police use a kind of cloaking device to
hide their identity so that they can do
undercover work. It can only work in
a cartoon movie.
This is important because various "forces"
are trying to nail down everything that
moves. One of those is Facebook, the
Face of the Devil.
a gratuitous plug for the out-ro song
from the movie:
As the chorus says "it's fucked up" which is what public
life is becoming when 99.9% of us are not criminals.
Facial recog has just been pushed into Orwellian-level
importance for our freedoms.
There are now various movements directed at helping us not
be (mis)spotted by intelligent facial-recog software. Various paths
from masks, to hoods, to eye slits are being used.
checkit: Kernel
The rise of the anti-facial recognition movement
By Joseph Cox on September 14th, 2014
With Facebook automatically tagging your photos, Google Glass apps being able to pinpoint faces, and police using high-end technology to match digital and physical identities, big brother’s watchful eye is all around us.
While the technology behind facial recognition continues to develop as its presence increases, some artists are trying to give citizens their privacy back the best way they know how—by designing contraptions that help ordinary citizens avoid detection.
You might not know Leo Selvaggio, but there’s a chance you’ve seen him—or someone strikingly identical to him. He’s white, male, and young. To be frank, there is nothing remarkable about his appearance, but that’s precisely the point.
Selvaggio’s the artist behind the URME Personal Surveillance Identity Prosthetic, a photo-realistic recreation of Selvaggio’s face that allows others to be able to assume his identity to protect their own. The mask is made from a pigmented hard resin using 3D-printing technology that allows for the replication of Selvaggio’s skin tone and hair. It’s detailed enough to fool the technology and inconspicuous enough to avoid drawing attention from people in a crowd.
“What is actually happening is that you’re creating disinformation.” —Leo Selvaggio
“I wanted something practical, that people could actually use,” Selvaggio recalls. He also offers cardboard versions for a cheaper price and a printable, free-to-download file. After raising well beyond his Indiegogo target of $1,000 back in June, Selvaggio has sold seven copies of the prosthetic mask, and over 50 of its low-tech alternative.
Instead of just remaining out of sight, the intention of the project is to flood the system with copies of his face. Not only does that protect whoever is behind the mask, it allows Selvaggio to explore his other interest: the conception of identity.
“What is actually happening is that you’re creating disinformation,” Selvaggio says. “What happens when there’s a hundred Leos walking in public spaces, all from different parts of the country? What is an automated system going to say about me then?”
Selvaggio1
The state of facial recognition
The inspiration for the URME Personal Surveillance Identity Prosthetic came in part from personal circumstance. Selvaggio lives in Chicago, the most-spied-on city in the United States. It’s home to Operational Virtual Field, a networked system of 24,000 cameras that can automatically search for a specific individual, pick them out, and bring up any other records that the system has access to. According to an ACLU report, the city’s mayor predicted that by 2016, there will be a camera on “almost every block,” and in June, police officers made their first arrest based off of the technology.
Although this may be an exciting idea for law enforcement, there are myriad problems with the technology that need to be considered.
Researchers in China claimed to have developed a kit that can match faces with up to 99.15 percent accuracy
“While facial recognition systems are billed as cutting-edge and sophisticated, they have been proven to be a problematic technology prone to errors,” says Mike Rispoli from Privacy International. “The angle in which the picture was taken, the lighting in the surrounding areas, the person’s skin tone or clothing, and other variables all have a significant impact on how the faceprint is registered and has been shown to create false matches.”
Selvaggio9
A 2011 PowerPoint slide by the National Security Agency, leaked by Edward Snowden, showed how easily the technology can create false matches. A facial recognition query for Osama bin Laden, for example, turned up four bearded men bearing only the slightest resemblance to him, according to the New York Times.
Such errors could have serious consequences
“When these systems are deployed by, for instance, law enforcement and border agencies, false matches can lead to wrongful arrests and detainment,” Rispoli warns.
It should be pointed out that there have been a number of recent success stories around facial recognition technology. In August, the FBI caught a fugitive who had been on the run for over a decade, thanks to a positive match between an old passport photo and a Nepalese visa application. In the same week, researchers in China claimed to have developed a kit that can match faces with up to 99.15 percent accuracy, even when dealing with various camera angles and lighting environments. More recently, another team from China has boasted 99.8 percent accurate results, after working on a database that contains 50 million Chinese faces.
As artists, they feel a certain inherent obligation to both caution and provoke.
But as law enforcement agencies expand their use of the technology, the potential for error will likely increase. That’s especially alarming considering that one of the FBI’s biometric databases will soon store millions of ordinary citizens’ faces.
“There are no meaningful protections in place when it comes to the collection, storage, security, and future use of that data,” Rispoli stresses. “Without strict and clear regulations of the databases that store faceprints, these systems threaten our right to privacy, not only when an initial scan takes place, but also what happens to that data after.”
At the moment, it’s not clear what happens to footage once it’s been collected if it isn’t part of a criminal investigation, and there aren’t any laws specifically crafted for facial biometric data. But there’s an even more fundamental issue that is particular to face-detecting.
“Biometric surveillance systems are problematic,” Rispoli says, “but facial recognition is of a different breed, since faceprints can be taken without our knowledge or consent.”
To caution and provoke
Unlike fingerprints or iris scans, which presumably have to be done either with your participation or by physical force, facial scanning can be done remotely and surreptitiously.
In their own way, independent artists are taking back control from a system that didn’t ask to track their identities.
Adam Harvey, a New York-based artist with a long list of privacy-focused projects, has developed Computer Vision Dazzle (or CV Dazzle), which aims to undermine surveillance algorithms by emphasizing and obscuring certain features on a participants face. His line of fashion products include an “anti-drone” burqa, Hijab, and hoodie.
Unlike fingerprints or iris scans, facial scanning can be done remotely and surreptitiously.
“It turns out that there is a vulnerability in the way 2D face recognition happens that allows someone to block it by creatively using hair, makeup, or other fashion accessories,” he writes via email. “Of course, it’s not an appropriate look for all occasions. But neither is a tuxedo.”
Harvey, who protects his online privacy by using virtual private networks (VPNs) and avoiding Google products, says that his “grand vision is to change the way we think about privacy, and by extension technology. I want to see more discussion and accountability for the technology choices we make.”
Another artist, Zach Blas, an assistant professor at the Department of Art at the University at Buffalo, wants to highlight the structural prejudices in biometric surveillance systems, such as race and gender.
The overall goal, at least according to Selvaggio is “to get people to engage with how fast the technology is moving, and how disproportionate the power is.” He also wants “to have people increase their amount of civil engagement.”
As artists, they feel a certain inherent obligation to both caution and provoke; Selvaggio calls them “the watchdogs of the future,” and those who campaign for changes in the law seem to agree.
“These projects seem like powerful ways to challenge our preconceived notions about privacy in public spaces,” offered Christopher Calabrese, legislative counsel from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) via email.
“Artists are right to draw attention to this powerful technology. Now it’s incumbent on lawmakers to give consumers back control over how it is used.”
- See more at: http://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-sections/features-issue-sections/10247/anti-facial-recognition-movement/#sthash.BO565zga.dpuf
software:
It looks surprisingly similar to a full-body
cloak in a movie I've seen which was
based on a Phillip K Dick book.
In the movie of A Scanner Darkly,
the police use a kind of cloaking device to
hide their identity so that they can do
undercover work. It can only work in
a cartoon movie.
This is important because various "forces"
are trying to nail down everything that
moves. One of those is Facebook, the
Face of the Devil.
a gratuitous plug for the out-ro song
from the movie:
As the chorus says "it's fucked up" which is what public
life is becoming when 99.9% of us are not criminals.
Facial recog has just been pushed into Orwellian-level
importance for our freedoms.
There are now various movements directed at helping us not
be (mis)spotted by intelligent facial-recog software. Various paths
from masks, to hoods, to eye slits are being used.
checkit: Kernel
The rise of the anti-facial recognition movement
By Joseph Cox on September 14th, 2014
With Facebook automatically tagging your photos, Google Glass apps being able to pinpoint faces, and police using high-end technology to match digital and physical identities, big brother’s watchful eye is all around us.
While the technology behind facial recognition continues to develop as its presence increases, some artists are trying to give citizens their privacy back the best way they know how—by designing contraptions that help ordinary citizens avoid detection.
You might not know Leo Selvaggio, but there’s a chance you’ve seen him—or someone strikingly identical to him. He’s white, male, and young. To be frank, there is nothing remarkable about his appearance, but that’s precisely the point.
Selvaggio’s the artist behind the URME Personal Surveillance Identity Prosthetic, a photo-realistic recreation of Selvaggio’s face that allows others to be able to assume his identity to protect their own. The mask is made from a pigmented hard resin using 3D-printing technology that allows for the replication of Selvaggio’s skin tone and hair. It’s detailed enough to fool the technology and inconspicuous enough to avoid drawing attention from people in a crowd.
“What is actually happening is that you’re creating disinformation.” —Leo Selvaggio
“I wanted something practical, that people could actually use,” Selvaggio recalls. He also offers cardboard versions for a cheaper price and a printable, free-to-download file. After raising well beyond his Indiegogo target of $1,000 back in June, Selvaggio has sold seven copies of the prosthetic mask, and over 50 of its low-tech alternative.
Instead of just remaining out of sight, the intention of the project is to flood the system with copies of his face. Not only does that protect whoever is behind the mask, it allows Selvaggio to explore his other interest: the conception of identity.
“What is actually happening is that you’re creating disinformation,” Selvaggio says. “What happens when there’s a hundred Leos walking in public spaces, all from different parts of the country? What is an automated system going to say about me then?”
Selvaggio1
The state of facial recognition
The inspiration for the URME Personal Surveillance Identity Prosthetic came in part from personal circumstance. Selvaggio lives in Chicago, the most-spied-on city in the United States. It’s home to Operational Virtual Field, a networked system of 24,000 cameras that can automatically search for a specific individual, pick them out, and bring up any other records that the system has access to. According to an ACLU report, the city’s mayor predicted that by 2016, there will be a camera on “almost every block,” and in June, police officers made their first arrest based off of the technology.
Although this may be an exciting idea for law enforcement, there are myriad problems with the technology that need to be considered.
Researchers in China claimed to have developed a kit that can match faces with up to 99.15 percent accuracy
“While facial recognition systems are billed as cutting-edge and sophisticated, they have been proven to be a problematic technology prone to errors,” says Mike Rispoli from Privacy International. “The angle in which the picture was taken, the lighting in the surrounding areas, the person’s skin tone or clothing, and other variables all have a significant impact on how the faceprint is registered and has been shown to create false matches.”
Selvaggio9
A 2011 PowerPoint slide by the National Security Agency, leaked by Edward Snowden, showed how easily the technology can create false matches. A facial recognition query for Osama bin Laden, for example, turned up four bearded men bearing only the slightest resemblance to him, according to the New York Times.
Such errors could have serious consequences
“When these systems are deployed by, for instance, law enforcement and border agencies, false matches can lead to wrongful arrests and detainment,” Rispoli warns.
It should be pointed out that there have been a number of recent success stories around facial recognition technology. In August, the FBI caught a fugitive who had been on the run for over a decade, thanks to a positive match between an old passport photo and a Nepalese visa application. In the same week, researchers in China claimed to have developed a kit that can match faces with up to 99.15 percent accuracy, even when dealing with various camera angles and lighting environments. More recently, another team from China has boasted 99.8 percent accurate results, after working on a database that contains 50 million Chinese faces.
As artists, they feel a certain inherent obligation to both caution and provoke.
But as law enforcement agencies expand their use of the technology, the potential for error will likely increase. That’s especially alarming considering that one of the FBI’s biometric databases will soon store millions of ordinary citizens’ faces.
“There are no meaningful protections in place when it comes to the collection, storage, security, and future use of that data,” Rispoli stresses. “Without strict and clear regulations of the databases that store faceprints, these systems threaten our right to privacy, not only when an initial scan takes place, but also what happens to that data after.”
At the moment, it’s not clear what happens to footage once it’s been collected if it isn’t part of a criminal investigation, and there aren’t any laws specifically crafted for facial biometric data. But there’s an even more fundamental issue that is particular to face-detecting.
“Biometric surveillance systems are problematic,” Rispoli says, “but facial recognition is of a different breed, since faceprints can be taken without our knowledge or consent.”
To caution and provoke
Unlike fingerprints or iris scans, which presumably have to be done either with your participation or by physical force, facial scanning can be done remotely and surreptitiously.
In their own way, independent artists are taking back control from a system that didn’t ask to track their identities.
Adam Harvey, a New York-based artist with a long list of privacy-focused projects, has developed Computer Vision Dazzle (or CV Dazzle), which aims to undermine surveillance algorithms by emphasizing and obscuring certain features on a participants face. His line of fashion products include an “anti-drone” burqa, Hijab, and hoodie.
Unlike fingerprints or iris scans, facial scanning can be done remotely and surreptitiously.
“It turns out that there is a vulnerability in the way 2D face recognition happens that allows someone to block it by creatively using hair, makeup, or other fashion accessories,” he writes via email. “Of course, it’s not an appropriate look for all occasions. But neither is a tuxedo.”
Harvey, who protects his online privacy by using virtual private networks (VPNs) and avoiding Google products, says that his “grand vision is to change the way we think about privacy, and by extension technology. I want to see more discussion and accountability for the technology choices we make.”
Another artist, Zach Blas, an assistant professor at the Department of Art at the University at Buffalo, wants to highlight the structural prejudices in biometric surveillance systems, such as race and gender.
The overall goal, at least according to Selvaggio is “to get people to engage with how fast the technology is moving, and how disproportionate the power is.” He also wants “to have people increase their amount of civil engagement.”
As artists, they feel a certain inherent obligation to both caution and provoke; Selvaggio calls them “the watchdogs of the future,” and those who campaign for changes in the law seem to agree.
“These projects seem like powerful ways to challenge our preconceived notions about privacy in public spaces,” offered Christopher Calabrese, legislative counsel from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) via email.
“Artists are right to draw attention to this powerful technology. Now it’s incumbent on lawmakers to give consumers back control over how it is used.”
- See more at: http://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-sections/features-issue-sections/10247/anti-facial-recognition-movement/#sthash.BO565zga.dpuf
the natives are restless
I grew up in an Anglophone culture, and I know that
much of Anglo culture is the same around the world
because it's usually propagated by Anglos.
I have come to the decision that there's often something
wrong with Anglos in their behaviour. They're far
too quick to judge people negatively and to fly
off the handle, as a result.
I always thought it was because they had spastic
colons, and emotional/sexual problems,
but there may be another reason.
Now, as I post this, I'm not sure you can paint a
whole nation as having a certain type of gene,
unless this is new epigenetics and a result of
the shitty weather in the UK, but anyway, let's
see.
checkit: Independent
The British are born to be miserable, new research finds
But it could be worse - we could be French
Rose Troup Buchanan Author Biography
Thursday 30 October 2014
“The British do not expect happiness,” claimed
English writer Quentin Crisp – and it appears he
may have been right.
New research from the University of Warwick
has indicated that Britons are genetically programmed
to be grumpy.
The British, French and Americans are all predisposed to be grumpier than nations such as Denmark because they possess a “short form” version of the gene which regulates the amount of serotonin – the chemical which controls happiness – within the brain.
The Danes, who regularly top happiness surveys of nations, enjoy a longer form of the gene, while Britons and Americans, despite equally stable economies and governments, possess a shorter version resulting in a miserable attitude.
However, it could be worse: we could be French.
According to professor Andrew Oswald, who led the research looking at 131 countries, only the French had a shorter form of the gene.
Professor Oswald, who studies applied economics and quantitative social science, claimed many nations’ citizens would still be unhappy were they earning a fortune, living to a ripe old age and basking in the sunshine daily.
“Among the nations we studied, Denmark and the Netherlands appeared to have the lowest percentage of people with the short version of the serotonin gene,” he said to The Times.
He also claimed American individuals descended from Danish or Dutch immigrants were happier as a result of inheriting the longer gene.
The research, for the Economic and Social Research Council’s Festival of Social Sciences, found that genetics was the most important factor – but not the only one.
Happiness leagues generally use indicators such as educational standards, wealth, health, economic progress and job satisfaction alongside the weather, war and political stability.
much of Anglo culture is the same around the world
because it's usually propagated by Anglos.
I have come to the decision that there's often something
wrong with Anglos in their behaviour. They're far
too quick to judge people negatively and to fly
off the handle, as a result.
I always thought it was because they had spastic
colons, and emotional/sexual problems,
but there may be another reason.
Now, as I post this, I'm not sure you can paint a
whole nation as having a certain type of gene,
unless this is new epigenetics and a result of
the shitty weather in the UK, but anyway, let's
see.
checkit: Independent
The British are born to be miserable, new research finds
But it could be worse - we could be French
Rose Troup Buchanan Author Biography
Thursday 30 October 2014
“The British do not expect happiness,” claimed
English writer Quentin Crisp – and it appears he
may have been right.
New research from the University of Warwick
has indicated that Britons are genetically programmed
to be grumpy.
The British, French and Americans are all predisposed to be grumpier than nations such as Denmark because they possess a “short form” version of the gene which regulates the amount of serotonin – the chemical which controls happiness – within the brain.
The Danes, who regularly top happiness surveys of nations, enjoy a longer form of the gene, while Britons and Americans, despite equally stable economies and governments, possess a shorter version resulting in a miserable attitude.
However, it could be worse: we could be French.
According to professor Andrew Oswald, who led the research looking at 131 countries, only the French had a shorter form of the gene.
Professor Oswald, who studies applied economics and quantitative social science, claimed many nations’ citizens would still be unhappy were they earning a fortune, living to a ripe old age and basking in the sunshine daily.
“Among the nations we studied, Denmark and the Netherlands appeared to have the lowest percentage of people with the short version of the serotonin gene,” he said to The Times.
He also claimed American individuals descended from Danish or Dutch immigrants were happier as a result of inheriting the longer gene.
The research, for the Economic and Social Research Council’s Festival of Social Sciences, found that genetics was the most important factor – but not the only one.
Happiness leagues generally use indicators such as educational standards, wealth, health, economic progress and job satisfaction alongside the weather, war and political stability.
Capitalism and the Soixante-huitards
I'm developing a theory about how France
morphed from a '68 (year of big youth riots)
society into a cynical Sarkozy-type Gallic
rip-off of Germany, with bankers taking
centre stage.
It seems that the '68 Rebels are as responsible
as anybody else, because they're now in charge.
I'll weave in sources as broad as Private Eye
(the Gods of alt-media) and the Guardian
to explain how this came about, and it
weaves in the Charlie Hebdo debacle, and
this movie from Costa Gavras.
In this scene (sorry for the espagnol) is
where the soixante-huitards get their
comeupance from the banker, at the dinner
table.
more later
morphed from a '68 (year of big youth riots)
society into a cynical Sarkozy-type Gallic
rip-off of Germany, with bankers taking
centre stage.
It seems that the '68 Rebels are as responsible
as anybody else, because they're now in charge.
I'll weave in sources as broad as Private Eye
(the Gods of alt-media) and the Guardian
to explain how this came about, and it
weaves in the Charlie Hebdo debacle, and
this movie from Costa Gavras.
In this scene (sorry for the espagnol) is
where the soixante-huitards get their
comeupance from the banker, at the dinner
table.
more later
Varoufakis as the Euro-killer
Coming soon
a full cultural analysis of this Varoufakis video,
from Germany,
the second by my count after a Dutch one (moron
that later)
a full cultural analysis of this Varoufakis video,
from Germany,
the second by my count after a Dutch one (moron
that later)
Star Trek: Prophets of Bankocracy
As a middling fan of Star Trek,
(meaning I never got dressed up like Trekkies
or said "live long and prosper")
I've read about how Gene Rodenberry, despite
fits and starts and last-minute changes,
produced shows which reframed the
human dynamic, in the most Shakespearean
of theatrical displays.
You have to really look to find the deeper significance
of a given story.
I just finished some research and so I study
everything to death, including my belly-button
lint.
Anyway, one recent show that I saw was called
The Gamesters of Triskelion had this basic scene:
(Firstly, Kirk gets the green chick, as usual)
Unseen (until later) higher beings seek to
capture slaves, training them to compete against
each other (under threat of death) so that the "brains"
could gamble on the result.
[at 39:10 Kirk meets "the bankers", in Davos, one assumes]
That has precisely described the Bankocracy
that we find ourselves in. The government, armies
and police exist to control us, and not control the bankers who
can do whatever they please.
Strangely, the bankers have neutralised the people's
weapons, which I can assume represents this "democracy"
bone that is usually thrown in our direction
every 5 years.
Neo-liberalism,
enforced by governments, is designed to have us
compete to the death (okay, it's a stretch- today,
but there is regular warfare)
while all the while, the bankers gamble on
everything we do, and everything we produce.
Isn't that why banks are stealing pensions, manipulating
every market from oil to macadamia nuts, creating
dark pools, and derivatives? Isn't that why EU banks
are bankrupt?
They gambled, with derivatives, on the shaky debt
that they created out of thin air
-banks create £ through computer printing (CTRL-P) -
to serve the purposes of Germany and France (mainly),
under the guise of the "unifying" Euro, so as
to subjugate the periphery, in more ways than one.
The most brilliant symbolism is saved (perhaps
by serendipity, or accident) for the Enforcer
with the shiny eyes. His name is Galt, the same
as the protagonist of Aynus Rand's book
Atlas Shrugged. Is Rodenbery trying to tell us
that Rand's Galt is actually a rent-seeker and
leach, rather than an industrialist?
I f%^&king sure as hell think so. I know it rings
true.
Now, a brave crew has sprung up in Greece, and
another is getting their wings in Spain (Podemos)
and they will return Earth to the path of
righteousness.
The Star Trek team has morphed into the
Greek government that will boldly go where
no lackey politician has dared go.
Up Merkel and Schauble's fat buttholes.
I think the iron backsides of the FinMin may
cause a problem, however.
In the final analysis, it will be Spock's wise
words, in the guise of Yianis Varoufakis,
the Greek FinMin that will force the
hypnotised peoples of Europe to see that
the Euro is a tool of subjugation and that
we are in a sort of Fourth Reich. If he
does that successfully, then the Euro
confidence game will collapse, without a
Grexit.
(meaning I never got dressed up like Trekkies
or said "live long and prosper")
I've read about how Gene Rodenberry, despite
fits and starts and last-minute changes,
produced shows which reframed the
human dynamic, in the most Shakespearean
of theatrical displays.
You have to really look to find the deeper significance
of a given story.
I just finished some research and so I study
everything to death, including my belly-button
lint.
Anyway, one recent show that I saw was called
The Gamesters of Triskelion had this basic scene:
(Firstly, Kirk gets the green chick, as usual)
Unseen (until later) higher beings seek to
capture slaves, training them to compete against
each other (under threat of death) so that the "brains"
could gamble on the result.
higher beings that gamble
[at 39:10 Kirk meets "the bankers", in Davos, one assumes]
That has precisely described the Bankocracy
that we find ourselves in. The government, armies
and police exist to control us, and not control the bankers who
can do whatever they please.
Strangely, the bankers have neutralised the people's
weapons, which I can assume represents this "democracy"
bone that is usually thrown in our direction
every 5 years.
Neo-liberalism,
enforced by governments, is designed to have us
compete to the death (okay, it's a stretch- today,
but there is regular warfare)
while all the while, the bankers gamble on
everything we do, and everything we produce.
Isn't that why banks are stealing pensions, manipulating
every market from oil to macadamia nuts, creating
dark pools, and derivatives? Isn't that why EU banks
are bankrupt?
They gambled, with derivatives, on the shaky debt
that they created out of thin air
-banks create £ through computer printing (CTRL-P) -
to serve the purposes of Germany and France (mainly),
under the guise of the "unifying" Euro, so as
to subjugate the periphery, in more ways than one.
The most brilliant symbolism is saved (perhaps
by serendipity, or accident) for the Enforcer
with the shiny eyes. His name is Galt, the same
as the protagonist of Aynus Rand's book
Atlas Shrugged. Is Rodenbery trying to tell us
that Rand's Galt is actually a rent-seeker and
leach, rather than an industrialist?
I f%^&king sure as hell think so. I know it rings
true.
Now, a brave crew has sprung up in Greece, and
another is getting their wings in Spain (Podemos)
and they will return Earth to the path of
righteousness.
The Star Trek team has morphed into the
Greek government that will boldly go where
no lackey politician has dared go.
Up Merkel and Schauble's fat buttholes.
I think the iron backsides of the FinMin may
cause a problem, however.
In the final analysis, it will be Spock's wise
words, in the guise of Yianis Varoufakis,
the Greek FinMin that will force the
hypnotised peoples of Europe to see that
the Euro is a tool of subjugation and that
we are in a sort of Fourth Reich. If he
does that successfully, then the Euro
confidence game will collapse, without a
Grexit.
Sunday, 9 November 2014
the State with an image problem
How is it that there's supposed to be this murderous State
in the Mid East that we're all supposed to be afraid of?
Have we ever seen them? Have they threatened us?
I don't think so. It's like an islamophobia plan gone wrong.
How do you get to set up a state just like that?
I think the planet has been pretty much carved up
into states, not leaving much dry land available.
And yet these guys found some lebensraum. right.
The last time the map was redrawn was in the early
20th c, by some lady from Cambridge.
or this
I rest my case.
IS doesn't even match the homecoming parade from Animal House:
and a passport office:
and bureaucrats:
more later
in the Mid East that we're all supposed to be afraid of?
Have we ever seen them? Have they threatened us?
I don't think so. It's like an islamophobia plan gone wrong.
How do you get to set up a state just like that?
I think the planet has been pretty much carved up
into states, not leaving much dry land available.
And yet these guys found some lebensraum. right.
The last time the map was redrawn was in the early
20th c, by some lady from Cambridge.
I shit you not.
I think the task was then given to a couple of
aristos, one from UK and one from France, to agree
areas of influence.
They both knew about the oil in the region too. That's
why there's no Kurdistan...yet.
why there's no Kurdistan...yet.
that's Sykes-Picot
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-25299553
Now supposedly these newcomers are going to redraw the map.
Couldn't be more f^*ked up than the existing one. Of course
you now have the US salivating hoping to remake the whole
map in its interests, those being whatever Isr wants.
Next image problem. These IS guys are supposed to be so tough
that they behead and kill at will. They're supposed to be so
bloodthirsty.
But, tell me whether this long line of pick-ups reminds you of
anything:
a homecoming paradeor this
I rest my case.
IS doesn't even match the homecoming parade from Animal House:
Sargent at arms yelling "faggots, faggots"
"you can get your thumb out of my ass now , Carmine"
Anyway. do you get my point?
It's all too pretty. These IS guys have so much
stuff given to them from the US that they didn't have
to steal anything. You've seen the shiny new Toyotas.
There's a whole segment of us cynical bloggers who
think that the US is behind it all.
Here's a media story to make you think. There's
shock and horror that boys raised in the West,
even those without Muslim heritage would go
down to the ME and fight for the IS.
Well, we bloggers seem to think that have
white twangy English-speakers in the IS ranks
would be a wonderful cover for the American
secret service guys who are prolly orchestrating
the whole thing.
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/08/28/western-jihadists-are-being-used-as-cannon-fodder-for-the-isis-leadership_n_5730510.html
All the sob stories of mum and dad crying
"bring my boy back from ISIS."
It just seems like Hollywood casting has
provided some crying parents for a
new type of "reality" show. "Ma and Pa Jihadi"
Something like Ma&Pa Kettle, but with Uzis.
There's Pa with some brown-lookin people
There's Pa being enticed with virgins from heaven.
"The Bride of ISIS" from the Daily Beast
I couldn't make this stuff up. That's how messed up this is
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/09/03/the-bride-of-isis-revealed.html
Cue the righteous indignation of Westerners,
accustomed to their own kids raping and pillaging
the ME, on the nightly news.
Now, some Western government, like the UK say they
won't negotiate with terrorists. But what if these
terrorists have oil for sale. Well, that's just business.
Everybody needs a bit of a deal on some barrels, don't
they?
Another side issue is the problems of Turkey in the area.
People are pushing Turkey to cross the border to
Kobani to help the Kurds. Except for two things,
firstly, Turkey would never piss on a Kurd, even if he
was on fire. They're worried of losing a chunk of
their country to the Kurds, if they get out of control,
seeing as the US has de facto allowed for a free
Kurdistan within Iraq.
On the other hand, the Russians seem to be
threatening Turkey with warfare if they cross that
line in the sand.
There's also my visionary plan. I think the US is
actually willing to carve up the map again, making
a Kurdistan out of Iraq, Iran and even Turkey.
Why? Cuz there's oil. cuz the Kurds are wild and
warlike, and the US can always use people like that.
This is not the first time the US would be looking
to solve another British fuckup. There's WW2, for one.
There's also the Cyprus problem. The British left
the island where Greeks were squabbling with the
Turkish minority.
The US wanted to use Turkey as a Cold war listening
post, so was willing to help Turkey carve up Cyprus.
And so it came to be.
Wherever the Brits used to divide and conquer, the US
is sure to have set up a stall.
More on that later.
Lastly, you can't have a State unless you've got
call waiting:
[sorry. couldn't find an operator with a burkah]
so, you want to do business with the State, and you
call their 0800 number and get a mechanised
response:
ISIS hotline: Hello, you have reached the Islamic State. For
beheadings, press 1, for recruitment, press 2. To report
the death of an infidel, press 3 and scream "allahu akbar"
after the tone.
"you can get your thumb out of my ass now , Carmine"
Anyway. do you get my point?
It's all too pretty. These IS guys have so much
stuff given to them from the US that they didn't have
to steal anything. You've seen the shiny new Toyotas.
There's a whole segment of us cynical bloggers who
think that the US is behind it all.
Here's a media story to make you think. There's
shock and horror that boys raised in the West,
even those without Muslim heritage would go
down to the ME and fight for the IS.
Well, we bloggers seem to think that have
white twangy English-speakers in the IS ranks
would be a wonderful cover for the American
secret service guys who are prolly orchestrating
the whole thing.
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/08/28/western-jihadists-are-being-used-as-cannon-fodder-for-the-isis-leadership_n_5730510.html
All the sob stories of mum and dad crying
"bring my boy back from ISIS."
It just seems like Hollywood casting has
provided some crying parents for a
new type of "reality" show. "Ma and Pa Jihadi"
Something like Ma&Pa Kettle, but with Uzis.
There's Pa with some brown-lookin people
There's Pa being enticed with virgins from heaven.
"The Bride of ISIS" from the Daily Beast
I couldn't make this stuff up. That's how messed up this is
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/09/03/the-bride-of-isis-revealed.html
Cue the righteous indignation of Westerners,
accustomed to their own kids raping and pillaging
the ME, on the nightly news.
Now, some Western government, like the UK say they
won't negotiate with terrorists. But what if these
terrorists have oil for sale. Well, that's just business.
Everybody needs a bit of a deal on some barrels, don't
they?
Another side issue is the problems of Turkey in the area.
People are pushing Turkey to cross the border to
Kobani to help the Kurds. Except for two things,
firstly, Turkey would never piss on a Kurd, even if he
was on fire. They're worried of losing a chunk of
their country to the Kurds, if they get out of control,
seeing as the US has de facto allowed for a free
Kurdistan within Iraq.
On the other hand, the Russians seem to be
threatening Turkey with warfare if they cross that
line in the sand.
There's also my visionary plan. I think the US is
actually willing to carve up the map again, making
a Kurdistan out of Iraq, Iran and even Turkey.
Why? Cuz there's oil. cuz the Kurds are wild and
warlike, and the US can always use people like that.
This is not the first time the US would be looking
to solve another British fuckup. There's WW2, for one.
There's also the Cyprus problem. The British left
the island where Greeks were squabbling with the
Turkish minority.
The US wanted to use Turkey as a Cold war listening
post, so was willing to help Turkey carve up Cyprus.
And so it came to be.
Wherever the Brits used to divide and conquer, the US
is sure to have set up a stall.
More on that later.
Lastly, you can't have a State unless you've got
call waiting:
[sorry. couldn't find an operator with a burkah]
so, you want to do business with the State, and you
call their 0800 number and get a mechanised
response:
ISIS hotline: Hello, you have reached the Islamic State. For
beheadings, press 1, for recruitment, press 2. To report
the death of an infidel, press 3 and scream "allahu akbar"
after the tone.
and a passport office:
and bureaucrats:
more later
Monday, 25 August 2014
50 shades of making whoopey on a pile of money
I'm not much of a novel reader. I missed the boat on
50 shades of Grey. I did notice how its mention
made chicks all squirmy. i love vulnerability.
Anyway, it turns out this book is about making
love to yourself, with your greed muscle. It's
not about sex as much as about money.
The sex, except for some expletives,
wouldn't shock your grandfather. In fact, it
would put him to sleep.
It just goes to prove my mantra about novels,
they're designed to control minds with just
enough sizzle to keep people from having
their own lives.
see 4:06
Here, the baffler kicks the shit out of 50SoG.
Get the whole piece.
checkit: Baffler
Fifty Shades of Late Capitalism
Heather Havrilesky
[from The Baffler No. 22, 2013]
While we are still recovering from the trauma that finance capital has inflicted on our public world, a late-capitalist fairy tale manages the pain in the more private and intimate reaches of the sexual daydream. In one version of the story, a wide-eyed mermaid cleverly disguises her essential self in order to win the heart of a prince (The Little Mermaid). In another, a hooker with a heart of gold navigates her way to a happy ending by offering some happy endings of her own (Pretty Woman). Or there’s the sassy secretary who shakes her moneymaker all the way to the corner office (Working Girl).
Fifty Shades of Grey follows this long history of class ascendancy via feminine wiles, but does so cleverly disguised as an edgy modern bodice-ripper. Forget that E. L. James’s three-book series captures the intricacies of BDSM about as effectively as a “Whip Me!” Barbie doll decked out in a ball gag, dog collar, and assless leather chaps. Although admirers of the series sometimes credit it with liberating female desire by reimagining pornography for ordinary women (and introducing them to the unmatched thrills of leather riding crops and hard spankings), the story of Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey isn’t really about dominance or bondage or even sex or love, despite all the Harlequin Romance–worthy character names. No, what Fifty Shades of Grey offers is an extreme vision of late-capitalist deliverance, the American (wet) dream on performance-enhancing drugs. Just as magazines such as Penthouse, Playboy, Chic, and Oui (speaking of aspirational names) have effectively equated the moment of erotic indulgence with the ultimate consumer release, a totem of the final elevation into amoral privilege, James’s trilogy represents the latest installment in the commodified sex genre. The money shot is just that: the moment when our heroine realizes she’s been ushered into the hallowed realm of the 1 percent, once and for all.
So Brazen
The fantasy life of Fifty Shades certainly isn’t focused on the sublime erotic encounter. The sex becomes hopelessly repetitive sometime around the third or fourth of the novels’ countless, monotonously naughty encounters. Each dalliance begins with the same provocative come-on: the naive college graduate Anastasia and the dashing mogul Christian describe their desire to each other with all of the charmless unpredictability of servers mouthing their prescribed scripts at an Australian-themed steakhouse. Awkward openers (“I think we’ve done enough talking for now,” “Now let’s get you inside and naked”) conjure the raw provocation of “How about a Bloomin’ Onion to get you started?” Even tougher to take are the coy responses (“Oh my!” “Why, Mrs. Grey, you have a dirty, dirty mouth!” “You’re insatiable and so brazen”), repeated with gusto despite a total lack of shock value in evidence. Readerly expectations tick up ever so slightly as Grey issues some bossy commands—Stand here! Undress! Bend over! Spread your legs!—which seem at first blush to foretell a curve in the carnal road. But no such luck. Give or take a blindfold here or a butt plug there, the same hands explore the same places in the same ways with the same results. After the fifteenth or sixteenth time Anastasia and Christian “find [their] release together,” they start to resemble tourists with no short-term memory, repeating the same docented visit to Graceland over and over again, drooling over the claustrophobic upholstered pool room and the mirrored wall and the fourteen-foot-long white leather couch afresh each time. By the third volume in the series, as every word out of Christian’s mouth (“I see you’re very wet, Anastasia”) still triggers an overheated response from his paramour (“Holy shit!”), readers may find themselves hissing, “Mix it up a little, for fuck’s sake!”[have you ever had a chick scream holy shit in the heat of the moment? me neither. that's a guy talking through a female character- Cos67]
What Fifty Shades of Grey offers is an extreme vision of late-capitalist deliverance, the American (wet) dream on performance-enhancing drugs.
But let’s not mistake sex for the main event. The endless manual jimmying and ripped foil packets and escalating rhythms and release-findings are just foreplay for the real climax, in which Anastasia recognizes that she’s destined to abandon her ordinary, middle-class life in favor of the rarefied veal pen of the modern power elite. Until then, like a swooning female contestant on The Bachelor, Anastasia is offered breathtaking helicopter and glider rides, heady spins in luxury sports cars, and windswept passages on swift catamarans. She is made to gasp at Christian’s plush office, with its sandstone desk and white leather chairs and its stunning vista, or his spacious, immaculate penthouse apartment, with its endless rooms filled with pricey furniture. She is treated to Bollinger pink champagne and grilled sea bass. She is offered a brand new wardrobe replete with stylish heels and gorgeous gowns and designer bras. She is lavished with diamond jewelry and flowers and a new luxury car of her own....
50 shades of Grey. I did notice how its mention
made chicks all squirmy. i love vulnerability.
Anyway, it turns out this book is about making
love to yourself, with your greed muscle. It's
not about sex as much as about money.
The sex, except for some expletives,
wouldn't shock your grandfather. In fact, it
would put him to sleep.
It just goes to prove my mantra about novels,
they're designed to control minds with just
enough sizzle to keep people from having
their own lives.
see 4:06
Here, the baffler kicks the shit out of 50SoG.
Get the whole piece.
checkit: Baffler
Fifty Shades of Late Capitalism
Heather Havrilesky
[from The Baffler No. 22, 2013]
While we are still recovering from the trauma that finance capital has inflicted on our public world, a late-capitalist fairy tale manages the pain in the more private and intimate reaches of the sexual daydream. In one version of the story, a wide-eyed mermaid cleverly disguises her essential self in order to win the heart of a prince (The Little Mermaid). In another, a hooker with a heart of gold navigates her way to a happy ending by offering some happy endings of her own (Pretty Woman). Or there’s the sassy secretary who shakes her moneymaker all the way to the corner office (Working Girl).
Fifty Shades of Grey follows this long history of class ascendancy via feminine wiles, but does so cleverly disguised as an edgy modern bodice-ripper. Forget that E. L. James’s three-book series captures the intricacies of BDSM about as effectively as a “Whip Me!” Barbie doll decked out in a ball gag, dog collar, and assless leather chaps. Although admirers of the series sometimes credit it with liberating female desire by reimagining pornography for ordinary women (and introducing them to the unmatched thrills of leather riding crops and hard spankings), the story of Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey isn’t really about dominance or bondage or even sex or love, despite all the Harlequin Romance–worthy character names. No, what Fifty Shades of Grey offers is an extreme vision of late-capitalist deliverance, the American (wet) dream on performance-enhancing drugs. Just as magazines such as Penthouse, Playboy, Chic, and Oui (speaking of aspirational names) have effectively equated the moment of erotic indulgence with the ultimate consumer release, a totem of the final elevation into amoral privilege, James’s trilogy represents the latest installment in the commodified sex genre. The money shot is just that: the moment when our heroine realizes she’s been ushered into the hallowed realm of the 1 percent, once and for all.
So Brazen
The fantasy life of Fifty Shades certainly isn’t focused on the sublime erotic encounter. The sex becomes hopelessly repetitive sometime around the third or fourth of the novels’ countless, monotonously naughty encounters. Each dalliance begins with the same provocative come-on: the naive college graduate Anastasia and the dashing mogul Christian describe their desire to each other with all of the charmless unpredictability of servers mouthing their prescribed scripts at an Australian-themed steakhouse. Awkward openers (“I think we’ve done enough talking for now,” “Now let’s get you inside and naked”) conjure the raw provocation of “How about a Bloomin’ Onion to get you started?” Even tougher to take are the coy responses (“Oh my!” “Why, Mrs. Grey, you have a dirty, dirty mouth!” “You’re insatiable and so brazen”), repeated with gusto despite a total lack of shock value in evidence. Readerly expectations tick up ever so slightly as Grey issues some bossy commands—Stand here! Undress! Bend over! Spread your legs!—which seem at first blush to foretell a curve in the carnal road. But no such luck. Give or take a blindfold here or a butt plug there, the same hands explore the same places in the same ways with the same results. After the fifteenth or sixteenth time Anastasia and Christian “find [their] release together,” they start to resemble tourists with no short-term memory, repeating the same docented visit to Graceland over and over again, drooling over the claustrophobic upholstered pool room and the mirrored wall and the fourteen-foot-long white leather couch afresh each time. By the third volume in the series, as every word out of Christian’s mouth (“I see you’re very wet, Anastasia”) still triggers an overheated response from his paramour (“Holy shit!”), readers may find themselves hissing, “Mix it up a little, for fuck’s sake!”[have you ever had a chick scream holy shit in the heat of the moment? me neither. that's a guy talking through a female character- Cos67]
What Fifty Shades of Grey offers is an extreme vision of late-capitalist deliverance, the American (wet) dream on performance-enhancing drugs.
But let’s not mistake sex for the main event. The endless manual jimmying and ripped foil packets and escalating rhythms and release-findings are just foreplay for the real climax, in which Anastasia recognizes that she’s destined to abandon her ordinary, middle-class life in favor of the rarefied veal pen of the modern power elite. Until then, like a swooning female contestant on The Bachelor, Anastasia is offered breathtaking helicopter and glider rides, heady spins in luxury sports cars, and windswept passages on swift catamarans. She is made to gasp at Christian’s plush office, with its sandstone desk and white leather chairs and its stunning vista, or his spacious, immaculate penthouse apartment, with its endless rooms filled with pricey furniture. She is treated to Bollinger pink champagne and grilled sea bass. She is offered a brand new wardrobe replete with stylish heels and gorgeous gowns and designer bras. She is lavished with diamond jewelry and flowers and a new luxury car of her own....
Sunday, 24 August 2014
when your teacher says the word "cool"
that's when you wrap your arms around
your ears, like an autistic having a fit.
I've just been exorcising those demons
from the past. I think I already had
a story about other aspects of this,
but I'll check.
The thing that really got me was
when our teachers tried to use
music to "connect" with us.
They used tunes that were
5 to 10 years out of date, and
ones that we kids did not go
anywhere near.
I was like most kids, pretty
sensitive to musical heresy,
and this is what we were put
through rather regularly.
The teachers were cleaned up
and nicely dressed, but something
tells me that during Woodstock
they would have been unrecognisable.
So, they gave us a bunch of
Woodstock , like Jonie Mitchell
and some post-Woodstock scary
vaudevillian stuff or cumbaya
stuff from the Hispanic world.
Here they are :
Captain and Tennille
and Paloma Blanca
fyeh. puke.
your ears, like an autistic having a fit.
I've just been exorcising those demons
from the past. I think I already had
a story about other aspects of this,
but I'll check.
The thing that really got me was
when our teachers tried to use
music to "connect" with us.
They used tunes that were
5 to 10 years out of date, and
ones that we kids did not go
anywhere near.
I was like most kids, pretty
sensitive to musical heresy,
and this is what we were put
through rather regularly.
The teachers were cleaned up
and nicely dressed, but something
tells me that during Woodstock
they would have been unrecognisable.
So, they gave us a bunch of
Woodstock , like Jonie Mitchell
and some post-Woodstock scary
vaudevillian stuff or cumbaya
stuff from the Hispanic world.
Here they are :
Captain and Tennille
and Paloma Blanca
fyeh. puke.
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