Look. It's a snowflake, a gay wink. no. It's a copyright violation

coming soon

those cunning Russians have found a way to
subvert the Olympic copyright mafia once and for all.

This mafia [stories later] runs around host
cities tearing down anything smacking of

Olympic spirit. 

Olympic Kebab Shack

is obviously trying to steal the thunder of

the doped sporting cartel. Bad Chef. Bad!

Also, it's become a gay theme as well. Russia's 

anti- gay-propagation laws meant that the fifth

wheel was not taken for a snowflake, but an anus.

Of course, it's a good joke, but don't say it too loudly

because it'll look like the gay backlash is

all about ass.

How's that for a jingle. 

The Olympics! All about ass
Those cunning Russians.
Wait a minute!

[BTW growing up, I always thought that Human League were gay.
the voices, the synths, the make-up. Now that I'm in the UK,
I'm not so sure. Does that make sense?]

And I used to think that organised sports were about

about crypto-fascist land acquisition games, as training

for warfare. Actually, it's the athletic version of 

"breasts & circumcisions"

that is so popular with the younger British royalty. 

It's all about that other big human urge. Sex.
The Bugler said that if it wasn't for some oiled up naked
Greeks then the Olympics would never have happened.
https://soundcloud.com/the-bugle/bugle-259-sochi-special

Let's look for evidence today:

Beach volleyball

 Is this what you're looking for?

Gymnastics

 sometimes about ass

 other times about fanny.

But they should stop using underage girls in this way. Sick

So, this is why my high school gym teacher refused to teach
olympic greco-roman wrestling. He said something about
dry humping, and went away red-faced.

Party on, Thomas Bach.

party on, Sochi  

Of course, there were thousands of condoms handed out to athletes again.
That's only because the Pill and Viagra set off the drug test.

 
UPDATE: Juice Rap News wades into the Sochi-sex debate: