Monday 25 February 2013

I hold this Bullshit in my hands to be true

words of the great Banksterus Maximus.

Richard Murphy, the bulldog of an accountant
 is cornering the Big 4 firms and going over
their innards with a fine-tooted butcher knife.

And , the Big 4 are getting all aristocratic, and
pissing in all directions.

Well, the last word goes to Richard, who
set up the
Bills Ten Commandments

that's Bill Dodwell of he Big 4

Checkit:  Tax research
A suggestion for Bill Dodwell’s code of conduct for NGO tax campaigners
Posted on February 17 2013
Bill Dodwell has said NGOs working on tax campaigning should be regulated. He had included me in his targets.
TJN has challenged Dodwell to propose the rules he'd like.
I can't resist proposing Bill's Ten Commandment for us tax campaigners (plus a few bonuses because once started I had trouble stopping):
1. Thou shalt not talk about tax avoidance as I sell it and would rather not mention the fact.
2. Thou shalt not talk about tax havens as my firm is in all the major ones.
3. Thou shalt not talk about transfer pricing because it inevitably allows companies to hide profits in tax havens and we would rather you did not point that out.
4. Thou shalt not talk profit shifting as we call it tax efficient supply chain management and it's a really good product line.
5. Thou shalt not call Ireland, the Netherlands and Switzerland tax havens since don't you know tax havens have palm trees?
6. Thou shalt not mention small business since they can't afford our services.
7. Thou shalt not mention opacity that allows people to hide what they're doing from prying eyes we do not like. We call it commercial confidentiality instead.
8. Thou shalt not mention automatic information exchange. Why on earth should the odds be stacked against our clients?
9. Thou shalt not mention putting accounts on public record. Heavens above, since when were accounts equated with accountability?
10. Please do not mention the world's tax systems being biased in favour of multinational companies. Don't you know they're my clients?
Bonus 1. Thou shalt not do honest research based on the accounts we have signed. Who gave you the right to think they might be reliable?
Bonus 2. Thou shalt not talk to parliamentarians about what you find. Why on earth should democratically elected people enquire about what we do?
Bonus 3. Thou shalt not mention professional ethics. Ethics are intended to constrain NGOs, not professions.
Bonus 4. Thou shalt not mention the tax gap. How dare you suggest some people do not pay the tax they might owe?
Bonus 5. Thou shalt show respect to those who earn more than you because don't you know earnings are directly correlated with ability?